#were these good idk I hope you like them
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Phantomfam headcanons for the soul? If u have any and wanna share ofc
This is more of a dadbastian headcanon, but I want to share :) I think early on in their contract Ciel would abuse his new found freedom and stay up really late, and at first Sebastian would be like "whatever you're the lord" and not really care because he didn't understand that little ten year old babies need to go to bed at a reasonable hour. So I think he would walk in on an extremely cranky little master at like 1:00 am and have to carry him to bed because he's too tired to walk. Seb would be super confused when he tried to get him up in the morning and be met with a death glare and an even grumpier than usual master throughout the day. Seb eventually realized he can't let him do that and has since set a strict bed time for his master, Ciel's also a sleepy guy so I think he grew out of this habit real quick. Honestly now that I think about it this was most definitely inspired by Coattails-I am not original :/ Also I'm not someone who thinks dadbastian is canon cause we all know Seb's a bastard and Ciel hates that bitch, but lets be real these two have father son moments in canon whether they like it or not. Like even if Seb doesn't feel parental towards Ciel, he's still a papa just a shitty one lol
I think Tanaka is happy that he can kind of take a back seat now and let Sebastian take the wheel, he thinks his young master is in good hands (oh how wrong he is😫!) and the manor is being taken care of, so he's chilling. Basically all of his friends/people he knew closely died in the manor massacre, so I think that's one of the reasons he seems so checked all of the time. Don't get me wrong he loves the others, but he's at an age where he just doesn't give a fuck anymore and has been through some shit so now he's taking it easy, as he should. I lowkey think he also might be smoking hella opium all the time so y'know good for him. Poor guy had to come down from a legendary high when R!Ciel came back so he could be a proper butler again.
I think Finny sees Ciel in a different light since the Green Witch arc and probably worries about him a lot more, he doesn't see him as his infallible master that always knows what to do in every situation as much, I think he's starting to see Ciel as the child he is and feels an even stronger and different sort of need to protect him that goes beyond loyalty and is more big brotherish now. (Also I have this theory that Finny's gonna be the one to figure out what Seb is first, and it leads to his death, but that's another thing.) I might have seen people say something similar to this again I am not original.
I don't have anything for the others that hasn't been said already, but I'll post about it if I think of something.
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Torn apart. Inspired by Romeo and Juliet by Sergio Cupido
#rdr2#morston#john marston#arthur morgan#red dead redemption 2#rdr#red dead redemption#arthur/john#john/arthur#morstonmonday#morston monday#hewo! happy to be here for another monday with you guys hehe#ALSO i wanna say. someone else did a redraw of them as this painting before kjhfgk#i had no idea and only saw it after i already started the wip#JUST KNOW ITS NOT LIKE. ORIGINAL AT ALL I JUST;;; HAVE LOTS OF THOUGHTS + EMOTIONS#but yeah idk if the many disembodied dutch hands keeping them apart makes sense to anyone but me#but like something something that man's actions ultimately were what tore them apart#as well as growing up under his care/influence inevitably created the wedge in between them#as well as the perceived rivalry over whos the favorite son or whatever#and then in more fucky terms. i like to imagine he was fucking them both and preventing them from doing the same with one another :)#something something that wouldn't be right but i know better so it's different with me#or whatever#sorry to spew my dutch grooming agenda all over you guys on this good monday. it will happen again#ANYWAY#again hope this resonates with anyone other than me lol#my art
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phinktober day 11: ur fav AU
i dont rlly do AUs so i just drew them how i wish they would dress xo
(dan’s tats r carnations and snowdrops and phil’s r roses and honeysuckle. for no reason 🤗)
ALSO bonus version w makeup bc i couldn’t pick <3
#soz copied caption from twt i have been drawing for 7 hours straight i need to drink water eat something take a piss and a shower and sleep#no braincell rn#goodbye it is wine time#hope yall like this idfk what people what these days other than ship art but im not doing that so sorry no knights fucking for you#just me making them look like me bc i’m a narcissist etc#god i am way too tired to be yapping rn i have no filter whatever ABYWAY HASHTAG DANIPHIW#art2 and craft2#dnp#phanart#dan and phil#daniel howell#amazingphil#dan howell#phil lester#phinktober#punk edits irl come back to me please#i’m missing a fkn hashtag i just know it whatever i don’t CARE im TIRED i have eaten nothing but half a jar of picked today i feel so goblin#idk why i tunnelvisioned w this piece it’s not even that good or detailed LMFAO#actually the tattoos were a BITCH and also made me sad bc of my whole failed tattooing career etc#OH MY GOD WHY AM I YAPPING SO MUCH SOMEONE EUTHANISE ME#good NIGHT !!!!!!#pickles not picked btw but i’m not retyping all of that#now i’m sad bc i’m out of pickles and it’s 10pm and everything is shut:( hate my stupid gay life
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if you like dead poets society, you may like these!
just for fun: a little list of movies, shows, and books i like that i feel have something in common with dps. hopefully you'll find something you'd like, too!
not in any particular order. just the order that i thought of them in really
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A Separate Peace
by John Knowles - published 1959
a coming-of-age novel set at an all-boys new england boarding school. follows two boys, Gene and Finny, and their experiences during the summer and winter sessions of 1942. talks a bit about WWII and what role the boys may have to play in that, but it stays pretty focused on the school and the emotions involved during this time in one's life. all the growth and transformation and oddly homoerotic, perhaps very codependent, friendship of a bildungsroman that we love to look for.
one of my personal favorite books, even considering that it was assigned reading. i truly believe many of you would like it and i know for a fact some of you can vouch for me
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The Perks of Being a Wallflower
by Stephen Chbosky - published 1999 movie adaptation: dir. Stephen Chbosky - released 2012
follows Charlie and his general struggles of high school and with being, well, a wallflower. from goodreads: "Caught between trying to live his life and trying to run from it puts him on a strange course through uncharted territory. The world of first dates and mixed tapes, family dramas and new friends. The world of sex, drugs, and The Rocky Horror Picture Show, when all one requires is that the perfect song on that perfect drive to feel infinite."
very emotional. that's all! i preferred the movie, but i liked the format of the book being completely in letters that Charlie was writing. they're both good! (if you watch the movie, the english teacher's name is Mr. Anderson. so do with that information what you will...!)
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Matilda
by Roald Dahl - published 1988 movie adaptation: dir. Danny DeVito - released 1996 musical adaptation: dir. Matthew Warchus - released 2022
a young girl with an aptitude for reading discovers she has telekinetic abilities at the same time she begins attending school. unfortunately, the principal is an extremely harsh woman, and none of the students seem to enjoy it there. Matilda uses her courage and newfound powers to change her environment for the better, both at school and in her abrasive home.
such a good movie, a childhood favorite. the musical has a great soundtrack too!
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Good Will Hunting
dir. Gus Van Sant - released 1997
a janitor is recognized as a mathematical genius by an MIT professor, and he goes on an emotional journey to embrace his intellect. starring Robin Williams, our dearly beloved inspiration, as the therapist Will goes to see for much of the film.
i only saw it once and my description is lacking but ooh it hurt...... just trust me on this one
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A Series of Unfortunate Events
by Lemony Snicket - published 1999-2006 tv series adaptation: aired 2017-2019
JUST HEAR ME OUT ON THIS ONE okay. it's about a trio of siblings, orphaned, who are shuttled from one parental unit to another while being followed by a man after their immense wealth. they quickly discover they are in the midst of an intellectual conflict in a secret organization. they must rely on only each other, seeing as all the adults around them are wildly incompetent and/or unhelpful. and it is filled to the brim with literary references!!
both versions have really fun and witty narration, and the tv adaptation is extremely faithful. i don't know how else to describe it without going overboard so i'll settle for not descriptive enough! just trust me. yes it is a kids' series and yes it is one of my favorites ever. it's the vibes of it all
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If We Were Villains
by M.L. Rio - published 2017
about a group of Shakespeare theater students at a very pretentious arts school who find themselves in a very high-tension dynamic following a disaster that occurs after their halloween performance of Macbeth. lots and lots of Shakespeare, lots of dramatics, and the book itself is divided into five acts.
i finished this in about two nights and it was extremely creatively inspiring. it was a bit predictable, but that's not a bad thing. it still had me clutching my pearls and dropping my jaw
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"The Artist of the Beautiful"
by Nathaniel Hawthorne - published 1844
a romantic era short story about a man who feels utterly trapped by his occupation. he would rather concern himself with the delicate beauty of nature, and he attempts to realize this in his passion project - much to the disdain of the people around him.
a bit of a sneak sorry. i just think it's just in line with neil's whole thing you know. it's a lot of long and flowery sentences but it works really well i promise
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The Breakfast Club
dir. John Hughes - released 1985
the letterboxd synopsis really says it all: "They only met once, but it changed their lives forever. | Five high school students from different walks of life endure a Saturday detention under a power-hungry principal. The disparate group includes rebel John, princess Claire, outcast Allison, brainy Brian and Andrew, the jock. Each has a chance to tell his or her story, making the others see them a little differently – and when the day ends, they question whether school will ever be the same."
i don't have much to add and to be honest! kind of a stretch for this list! but i have faith
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obviously there are other shows and movies with the dead poets society leads, but i wanted to sort of branch out a bit for the bulk of this list. i will still list the ones i had in mind though
House M.D. (2004-2012) - tv series about genius diagnostician Dr. Gregory House and his team at a hospital in new jersey. Robert Sean Leonard stars as House's best friend and head of oncology Dr. James Wilson. very comedic but also very heartwrenching.
Tape (2001) - three friends meet at a motel room and dredge up and argue over unpleasant events of the past. starring Ethan Hawke and Robert Sean Leonard.
Before Sunrise (1995) - from letterboxd: "A young man and woman meet on a train in Europe, and wind up spending one evening together in Vienna. Unfortunately, both know that this will probably be their only night together." Ethan Hawke plays one half of the lead duo.
and yeah there's a LOT more but those are the ones i've seen and sincerely recommend. not to say others aren't good but this is a (very) curated list you see.
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phew that's not as many as i thought i had in my back pocket but it's still pretty good. plus, there's some things i havent read/watched yet that perhaps would have made it but alas! such is life
absolutely add to the list if you'd like!! let's all share our favorite stories
#this is my post i hope you like it#what am i supposed to tag. all of them i guess#dead poets society#dps#a separate peace#the perks of being a wallflower#matilda#good will hunting#a series of unfortunate events#if we were villains#the breakfast club#house md#idk im not tagging the other ones lol.#robin williams#ethan hawke#robert sean leonard
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Carlos Sainz | F1 London Live in 2017 | x x x x x
#carlos sainz#autumn posts#explored this event last eve and omg so many wonderful moments!!!!#oh to be able to time travel 🚀 surfing the web will have to do!!#also I'll still reblog and post RBR of old and Max related content in 2025 but#wow they have made some immensely frustrating decisions as a company#I do sure despise their upper management!#also tbh I am glad newbies get chances but it seems like 2025 is going to be maybe too many rookies maybe o.o idk I just got here#and I know F1 teams are probably trying some succession planning and lots of new brands hopping on seem geared to younger fans#and I love Gabi and Jack and I'm sure Ollie and Kimi are great! idk them as well yet! and I miss Franco :(((#but idk I'm already missing the older drivers we lost like what do you mean Carlos is fourth oldest he's my age 🥲#idk I like grizzled old men!!!! and drivers who are still in their prime!! 30s isnt old!!! (I know it is in the world of f1 but...)#idk I know big F1 is trying to plant seeds but they're pulling up perfectly gorgeous trees to do so....I just got here too!!!!!!#hmmmm rambling balogna from a new fan#also I dont like watching cars crash so really really hoping the races next year with all these green drivers aren't too bad 🫣#idk I get worried!! and all the engineers and bts folks have to deal with wrecks so#mannifesting safe drives and good starts 🙏✨#and rbr and vcarb are on my shit list for now but the Max blogging will not cease#he and I will both be in our sixties and I'll be here salivating hehe 😵💫✨#gosh dad bod Max 😵💫❤️✨ heaven help me the thirst blogging will be off the charts here#okay enough yapping!!!#wishing everyone a v excellent Friday!! ☀️☁️🌙✨#brb soon to spam F1 Live in London content bc oh gosh what a rich well#also I won't spam too much hehe I'll space it out#also the Little Mix girlies (gn) were OUT at this event so that was fun!!#an insta feed of F1 drivers and a ton of Little Mix bloggers since they performed there! and I like Jade!! I gotta check when her albums out#okay autumn out!!! 🫡❤️✨ bye for now!
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okay, inspired by @dragon-spaghetti's chronic pain Husk headcanons, I present Angel with atypical migraines
Angel getting knocked off balance after a few grueling weeks at the studio (because stress makes them worse), but like with the kind of vertigo that makes you feel like you're floating and untethered, but not spinning
Husk notices when something's off because Angel will stand up from the bar and pause with a hand outstretched before he starts walking, like he needs to recalibrate real quick
he lays on top of Husk with his face in Husk's chest because it's dark and then he'll forbid Husk from moving because that makes it worse, so Husk just kinda rests a hand on his back while they cuddle
#idk idk i've been thinking about this like#if you see this i hope you don't mind that i tagged you#but the chronic pain husk hcs were so good and i am dying to talk about chronic pain husk and atypical migraines angel#i haven't fleshed out the thoughts really at all but i just think angel gets these occasionally and it'll just#wreck him#husk keeps him company because like....there's not much you can do for vestibular migraine#yes i AM projecting onto him#what are blorbos for if not to make them suffer as you suffer#hazbin hotel#hazbin angel dust#i think he would get pain too but as the vertigo part wears off#and more like mild to moderate pain#idk i'm still sort of figuring out how this looks in my head#but i just like the idea of his head feeling bad and the two of them taking care of each other during their bad times
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Chapter 110 is 13 pages long welcome to hell!!! so in a lot of ways this is just more fuel for a theory that I've had for a few weeks now, that's only gotten stronger with each recent season 5 episode, which is that the last episode of the season is gonna end on 110, and that Asagiri/Harukawa and Bones have been collaborating to make this happen, specifically because it's a major turning point that would be the only good place to end the season on.
When we started getting especially long chapters again (like from 25-35ish pages, with the exception of 107.5, the last two being some of the longest we've ever had), at first I just assumed that Asagiri/Harukawa got freed up from some other obligations they'd been having to cause the extremely short/half chapters, like promotional stuff for the anime/Beast movie, or working on light novels. But then 109 happened, with the "supposed" death of Dazai, and heavy emphasis at the end on how literally everyone is at their lowest point right now, and I got to thinking. 11 episodes is a strangely specific number for an anime season -- why not 12, or 13, or even 10, like you'd usually see? Why have we gotten suddenly gotten two 35 page chapters out of nowhere, that's almost unheard of at this point? They're both beautiful chapters, don't get me wrong (as always), and maybe A/H simply just didn't want to cut them in halves because they felt like the full emotional impact wouldn't hit/that there were no good cutoff points in them, but you can't deny that it's surprising, after all the shorter chapters we've been getting. Why has the anime been going at such insanely breakneck pacing for the most part ever since around the Sunday Tragedy chapters, even more so than it has in the past? So much so that it feels dangerously close to overtaking the manga?
Well, maybe, just maybe, it's because..... Asagiri decided a long time ago that whatever happens in 110 is the only point that feels "season finale"-worthy enough, in an arc that still isn't anywhere close to being completely wrapped up, and so both the manga and the anime have been specifically coordinated to reach that part within 2 and a half weeks of each other?
I've seen a lot of people now think season 5 will end with 109, and as much as my sadistic side would find that hilarious, I honestly don't think they'd do that and realistically don't want it to happen; it'd be so cruel to cliffhanger the anime for years like that, and just doesn't feel like a season cliffhanger BSD would do, a series that is ultimately hopeful and uplifting. Seasons 2 and 3 had a positive, conclusive ending; the only reasons seasons 1 and 4 didn't was because they're technically not really full seasons of their own, and are more like the first cour of another "season" that also came out that same year (seasons 1 and 2 both aired in 2016, so they're more like one big season, and seasons 4 and 5 have both aired this year, so they're also more like one big season, again taking into account how episodes 12 and 50 are not satisfying finales like episodes 24, 37, and hypothetically, 61, are). I really can't see season 5 ending with Dazai and Fukuzawa's supposed deaths, Sigma being unconscious and maybe close to death, Atsushi being vulnerable and limbless again, everyone we love still vampires, and the entire world being basically doomed; that's just too depressing and not like BSD at all. However, having said that, if it doesn't end there, there really isn't any good place to end the season before that, either, that feels in any way satisfying or like a finale at all. And so, to me, that only leaves after 109: chapter 110.
I think things are really gonna turn around next chapter. Like I said, everyone is at their lowest point right now, it cannot possibly get any worse, the framing of Dazai, Fukuzawa, and sskk at the end of 109 is telling us that; this is the time for the heroes to finally start winning again, with Aya being so close to pulling out the sword, and for all the thematic reasons other people have talked about to death that I don't need to go into here again. This upcoming chapter being so short again makes a part of me wary of 110 being "the one", so to speak, I won't lie, but at the same time, it's very possible that it needs to be that short because that's all the final episode of the season will be able to reasonably fit in, since it's already gonna be VERY close if they do make it all the way to 109. And at the end of the day, I don't doubt at all that Asagiri and Harukawa can make these the most monumental and game-changing mere 13 pages ever if they wanted to; a chapter does not at all need to be extremely long in order to be an important and impactful one, even if short ones we've gotten in the past haven't felt the most important.
An additional thought I've had, though this is much more crack territory than all this already is, is that since we know from Anime Expo that a Stormbringer movie at some point is highly likely (judging from Asagiri's reaction when someone brought it up), it's possible that chapter 110 and thus the final episode will involve the long-anticipated return of Verlaine and/or Adam, or at least some other major reference to Stormbringer, that would naturally and smoothly lead into a Stormbringer movie to explain things to people who haven't read the novel. It would make a lot of sense, especially since the s4 OP has the Old World sign behind Chuuya, which might be a hint that this has been in the works ever since seasons 4/5 were first in planning with Asagiri. We also know that Dazai and Chuuya's voice actors apparently struggled to record their lines together this season, which probably relates to 101 and possibly 109, but it could be 110 too.... I could be very wrong, as I'm no expert on this kind of thing, but I kinda doubt they would bring Chuuya's actor in for just the vampire growls, and Asagiri placing heavy emphasis on Chuuya's importance this season in that one interview gives me the impression that he's talking about much more than just 101/109. But that's the least solid evidence I have, that's just mostly based on vibes I get.
So basically, I think a lot of factors -- the unusual episode count, how close the anime is to catching up to the manga with three whole episodes left, the seemingly arbitrary recent chapter lengths, and the climactic events of 109 -- can tell us that 110 might be a very, VERY big deal. Again, there's of course no way this arc is anywhere near close to being finished, with so much left to address and resolve, but since it is currently incomplete in the manga, unlike the previously adapted arcs, if the anime was going to adapt it at all, they'd have to find a place that feels satisfying enough to end this season, knowing there won't be more anime for a long time after this, and so I think they specifically planned for that, from both Bones' and A/H's sides. 10 episodes might not have been enough to reach that point, but 12 or 13 might have been too many it wouldn't have been if Bones actually decided to slow down and let the story breathe the way it needs to, but this post isn't meant to criticize the anime, so maybe 11 was just right. And maybe Asagiri and Harukawa specifically pushed to make recent chapters longer than usual, in order to make sure that the manga reached the story content in 110 the monthly release right before season 5 was to end.
Is this just copium? Absolutely. Am I going to look like an absolute clown in two days when this post ages like milk? Probably. But the evidence is There, so let me just enjoy my delusions until Sunday, okay 🥂🫡
#bungou stray dogs#seriously call me a clown and point and laugh at me if I'm proven wrong all you want#but I really feel like there's solid evidence for this#either s5 isn't gonna reach 109 at all (but I seriously cannot fathom where you would want to stop before then) or they'll go beyond it#if they really do end it with 109....... well i'll give Bones kudos for having the balls to do that ig lol#maybe i'm underestimating (overestimating???) them idk#also just to clarify I don't wanna make it sound like I think Asagiri let the anime/Bones dictate the manga's pacing#like I'm sure these were his/their (him and Harukawa's) own decisions first and foremost#not that (if this theory is true) the anime had a major impact on how the chapters were split and that it-#-would have been extremely different otherwise#i'm pretty confident in that Asagiri does not do anything with BSD he isn't comfortable with#and he doesn't let anyone tell him how to write his story#I just feel like he worked with Bones to make this near-simultaneous release happen#BUT if this is the case I don't feel like it had any major effect on the writing/final product that is the manga#like the last handful of chapters have been so incredible#so I at least am still perfectly happy lol#(i mean i'm devastated and a nervous wreck but u know 🫡 in a good way lmao)#anyway 110 in two days please let this theory be true because I need some fucking hope already#please let Oda show up as Dazai's guardian angel to help (see what I did there-)#it would be the perfect way to end the collective season that is 4/5 with s4 beginning with Oda and now ending with Oda#Asagiri are you reading me are you picking up what I'm putting down please please a ghost Oda is long overdue please-#Oda Verlaine Adam just GIVE ME SOMEONE ALREADY 😭😭😭#MAYBE EVEN A TASTE OF THE FYODOR BACKSTORY TO TIE INTO HIM BEING IN ANIME UNTOLD ORIGINS. THE POSSIBILITIES ARE ENDLESS
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Hobie1610 pt. 4
after so many months of waiting, the wait... is finally over.
here is the fourth and final part of this little au idea i had brewing in my head for some time now. i hope you guys enjoy?
and thanks so much to everyone leaving encouraging and kind comments on the previous parts as well! really appreciate y'all :)
hope this ending is a satisfying one :)
>pt. 1 here<
>pt. 3 here<
MJ: We’re going to hang tomorrow after my shoot, right?
It was a text that Miles looked at and looked at and looked at all day ever since it arrived into his messages that very morning. It literally came out of nowhere.
But how long ago was it that he and Hobie Jones ran into each other at Central Park? It had to have been like a week ago, he was pretty sure...
He thinks.
“Maybe the guy’s pushy or somethin’, he just really likes you for some reason,” Ganke had offered by way of explanation as they sat together at lunch for the first time in what seemed like forever.
Miles wasn’t entirely sure when he and Ganke ever got to chill like this together in the cafeteria area... but as luck would have had it, Ganke’s mom forgot to send over some money for the week, forcing him to buy from the cheaper menu that the school had to offer rather than ordering off of the many food delivery apps he had on lock in his phone.
They sat a ways away from the hustle and bustle of the main area, near a big window that looked outwards into the typical scene of the congested New York City streets, and Miles would have been perfectly content with this arrangement had it not been for The Text.
He jiggled his leg and rubbed at his jaw in between bites of his own cheap meal-- something he got even though he didn’t really want it, but what was he gonna do, let Ganke wait in line by himself?-- gazing at his cell phone sitting right by his elbow. The text message was gazing right back at him.
“I… dunno. I-- man, I wish I told you more about my patrols so you can remind me how long ago Central Park was. I swear it was only like… last week? Right?”
Ganke chomped on his own slice of pepperoni pizza and shrugged. “I think that was a while ago. Either way, he wants to go on this date with you. So you might as well.”`
Miles groaned. “It’s not a date, Ganks. We’re just… chillin’, hangin’ out a little,” he gestured with his hands, which was not convincing Ganke at all. “Y’know?”
Ganke leaned forward a little bit, glasses slipping down his nose as he grinned mischievously. “Did he figure out it was you, Mi? Is that why you’re so nervous about it?”
“Whaaat are you talking about? No… no, he didn’t! I just. Uh, I saved him from those scary gang members and then I swung him home and that was that. No one else knows but you and my parents, Ganke, promise.” Miles’ smile was even less convincing.
“Miles,” Ganke deadpanned, “have you ever thought about what would happen if some Flickstagram-famous model learns about your thing you got goin’ on? He could be pushing this because he knows already, dude. Or at least he thinks he does. You’re a weird kid after all, and it wouldn't take too long to put two and two together... no offense.”
Miles shoved a fist under his chin and chewed a french fry pensively, trying to come up with an answer that wouldn't give him away.
The thing is, Hobie did know.
Miles still couldn’t shake off the memories of his warm fingertips hooking under his mask and slowly lifting it off of his face, the way his entire visage seemed so positively radiant with that dazzling smile once they met eyes. He remembered Hobie’s wiry arms clutching onto him for dear life as they flew across the stadium towards the exit, the easy banter they had going back and forth after the action finally died down and they were safely heading back to the outer gates of the park.
So Hobie definitely knew. That wasn’t really the problem... although, Ganke might be right. It could be in the future, if Miles didn’t play his cards right.
Hobie is a solid guy no matter what dimension Miles found him in. Even as the Prowler on earth-616, that Hobie Brown was as an upstanding citizen as any crook could be. But flashes of earth-42 kept sparking up right behind his eyes every time doubt popped up about a new player in his life here on earth-1610, and one can never just assume anyways.
And now Miles is sitting at his lunch table with his best friend— who, until now was the only living person on this planet who knew about his secret identity— ruminating on whether or not Ganke might end up being a damn seer after all. Ganke doesn’t know that Hobie knows, but he really just might be right anyhow. That would really be Miles' luck.
Goddamnit.
Is Hobie planning on blackmailing him somehow? His involvement with those thugs stealing a prominent museum’s precious security info seemed a bit off to him, the more he thought about it.
They joked about it many a time over text, but Miles would be lying if he said he hadn’t turned a couple of facts over and over on more than one sleepless night. Hobie mentioned having connections, a camera, and seemed almost too recklessly opportunistic when it came to the chance at nabbing that flash drive...
Doubt was sinking back in. Miles drummed his fingers on the table and shot Ganke a look. “... Whaddya think I should do if he does, then?”
“What, if he finds out?”
“Yeah.”
Ganke shrugs again, popping a pepperoni slice into his mouth and thinking while he chewed. “Web him up to a lamppost,” he said after a bit.
Miles snorted with laughter. “Ganke, be for real right now. You’ve got great coding and social media knowledge, dude. Could you hack his tech if asked you to? Like, just in case?”
Ganke waggled his head, making a show of really, really thinking it through. “Mmmmn, yeah maybe.”
Miles sighs. “What do I have to do?” He asks because he knows his best friend by now.
“Fifty bucks and you also have to do my laundry for a week. What?” Ganke exclaims upon suddenly being on the receiving end of Miles’ glare, “If I get caught, it could mean like federal level charges on my head, dude. Take it up with the law, not me!”
Miles sighs and returns back to his plate of cold fries. “Yeah, yeah. You got a point,”
“But you gotta meet up with him first, figure out what we're dealing with. Just stop putting it off, bro. Avoiding him'll make you look more suspicious. Might as well get it done and over with,”
Miles swallows his fries along with his anxiety, picks up his phone, and starts drafting his answer to Hobie’s sudden proposal.
He doesn't know why there's a pit of dread in his stomach, but he opts to ignore it this time.
He hopes Ganke is wrong.
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The next day, MJ's cell phone vibrates on the portable vanity set up at the studio where his current shoot is taking place.
He’s busy, trying not to get too lost in the flurry of hands prepping him, the flashing of the cameras, the shouts of directions from the camera guy as he hits pose after pose with the props on set.
It’s when he’s changing into his last outfit for the shoot that he finally has some time to sip his water bottle and mindlessly scroll through dozens of notifications, finally coming across the one notif he waited to get the entire day: Miles. His name appeared at the very bottom.
... Meaning he received the message hours ago. Shit.
With his shoot almost over, MJ punched in a quick message and hit send, excitedly returning back to the set and finishing his work day up as quickly as humanly possible.
MJ's absentmindedly agreeing that every picture the director shows him is truly amazing, yes, amazing indeed, all while trying not to vibrate out of his mind-numbingly expensive designer outfit he’s been forced into. The only person he can think about as he dumbly nods along to whatever the crew is saying to him is Miles. Miles, Miles, Miles.
Miles has agreed to finally-- finally, after all of these weeks-- meet up with him and make good on his promise. Of course, MJ's slightly miffed that it had to be him to initiate the lunch date in the end, but whatever.
Closed mouths don’t get fed, after all. And Miles was technically not breaking his promise.
So now MJ is floating back down the hallway to the makeup room, gently pushing past all of the other models and swatting away at his mother’s hands while he makes his way over to his duffle bag.
“MJ, darling. Look at me,” his mother says as she hooks a finger under his chin and examines his makeup. “Do you wanna be wearing this when you go hang out with your little friend today?”
Your little friend, MJ almost scoffs out loud, but manages to school his expression into one of pure professionalism. “Yes, mom. Nothin' wrong with it,” he answers breezily.
She hovers. "I mean, it might make your friend think that... uhm, well. You know, it might give the wrong impression. He'll think you two are on a date! You're not allowed to date."
"Sure, mom. Except he knows I'm a model. The whole city does at this point." His tone drips with teenage attitude.
She lets him go.
Then, he’s unbuttoning his shirt and untying a sparkly scarf doubling as a belt to hold up the comically baggy jeans he was assigned to wear today, impatient to shrug himself out of those clothes and jump into his own so he can finally, finally, finally run down to the little cafe he told Miles to meet him at.
His mother was busy on a tablet typing away at something, chatting with MJ's agent once he found his way over to them, and even when neither of them noticed much about MJ on any other day, it seemed they were paying special attention to the way he was throwing his clothes back on with obvious glee now.
MJ had never smiled this much around them, and they sure took note of it now.
“Heard you’re getting ready to meet with a friend, MJ,” his agent told him once he turned his attention back to his client.
“Yyyep,” MJ answered noncommittally. He threw on a coat and started to reach for his messenger bag, stopping when a hand grabbed his shoulder and squeezed.
“We’re gonna keep in touch with the team, and keep updating you on the status of the shoot, but we gotta make sure you’ve got your phone on, right?” His agent looked him directly in the eye. “It’s great that you’re making friends again, Em, but you have to keep your head in the game.”
Yeah, of course. “Don’t let anything distract you from helping me make money” is what you mean, MJ thought ruefully, blinking back innocently.
He nodded and offered his agent a casual smile. “I mean yeah. He’s just a friend, I’m not gonna let that get in the way of my job. Don’t worry,” he adds, “I got my phone on. Hit me up when something cool happens.”
His agent and his mother exchange glances, but agree to release him anyways.
“I mean, he’s still a kid,” he hears his mother say as he quickly exits the room and finds his way towards the elevators. “I let him have a little fun every once in a while! The real work doesn’t start until he’s older right? Might as well let him have this for now..."
MJ rubs his thumb up and down along the edge of his phone case, feeling the bumps of the volume keys over and over.
He steps into the elevator when the doors slide open. He punches the button for the main lobby and stares down at his messages with Miles.
Yes, he thinks a bit vindictively, the real work doesn’t start until he’s older.
She definitely isn’t wrong about that.
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"You ever think about running away at all?" Hobie asked Miles rather suddenly after they got their usual greetings done and over with.
The cafe Hobie picked was cute, quaint, and very small. A nice little reprieve from the noisy halls of their school and the bustling city streets, since the business didn't seem to have any other patrons at this hour aside from the two boys.
They picked their seats right next to the window and opted to people-watch for a bit as they scrolled through the cafe's stylized menu on their phones. The lighting of the late-afternoon day illuminated Hobie in such gorgeous warm light that Miles was almost suspicious; did he pick this place specifically because the late sun's rays would bounce off of nearby skyscrapers and cast them both in the best mood lighting New York City had to offer? It sure seemed like it.
Hobie leaned back in his seat and gave Miles the most charming smile he's seen on a guy yet, erasing his suspicions from his brain entirely. And... well, anything else as well.
"Uhhh," Miles offered intelligently.
Hobie huffed a laugh in response. "It's okay, I know it's a weird question. Forget I said it."
Miles shook his head. "Wait, no. Sorry, what'd you say again? I'm, uhm. Sorry, I think I'm just a little tired. Kind of out of it,"
Hobie nodded sagely, setting his phone aside for the time being. "Hmm, late night homework, right? Essays maybe?"
They chuckled and grinned at each other cheesily, the knowledge that they shared a big secret between them settling comfortably and cozily like a fat cat curling up near a fireplace. It was nice, kinda. To be in on something that not many other people were, like an inside joke or a long-running bit between old friends.
But then Miles' earlier conversation with Ganke at the school cafeteria floated back up in his mind again and he had to bite his lip to keep from frowning suddenly. He looked down, a bit ashamed.
"Hobie--" he started.
"MJ," Hobie interrupted, chin in his hand now.
Miles looked up. "MJ. Oh, yeah. Right, sorry."
"I don't really like my given name, so no one calls me that. Just call me MJ. Or Em, even. That's what my agent calls me."
"Agent. Geez. So you didn't really answer my question earlier, back when we first met," here, Miles folded his arms on the table in front of him. "How famous are you, really?"
MJ grinned like a mischievous cat, chin still in one hand. "You've been on my Flicksta page this entire time since you found it. How famous do you think I am? Not that hard to do research nowadays, right?"
Miles felt his face heating up. "H-how'd you know about that?"
"You liked a post of mine that I made like... last year, dude. I saw."
Miles silently cursed himself out as he shut his eyes in embarrassment and winced. "Yikes. Alright, I guess you caught me. That was my bad for sure!"
MJ's grin was crooked. "Yeah, I'm... pretty well-known. Not supermodel status yet obviously, but I've been on a couple billboards. Posters, some ads. I'm training to walk some shows. Whatever." He leaned back in his seat again and messed with his sweater's sleeves a little as he spoke. Distantly, Miles noticed how expensive MJ's clothing really looked, how plush the knit of his sweater was, and the tailoring of his coat.
"Whatever," Miles echoed inquisitively. "Do you hate it? Is that why you wanna run away?"
They met eyes.
"I thought I told you to forget that question, Morales," MJ replies coolly. "It was a weird one. I dunno why I even said it,"
Miles, sensing something in the air between them, wondered if he should have changed the subject. Too bad his mouth had a less-than-stellar track record of listening to his brain.
Instead, he opened it and quietly said: "If we're gonna be friends, and if you want me to not web you up to a pole somewhere in Manhattan, I gotta know your deal."
"Mn, my deal," MJ repeated warily.
"Yeah," Miles sighed, already resigning himself to just getting this over and done with already. No time like the present, right? "You mentioned... you mentioned having a camera and connections. And you're just... weird, man. Like, no offense but you being in Central Park when you were that one time? Running away from those gang members who looked like they were gonna strangle you for takin' their flash drive away from 'em? That was super risky. Something's up."
MJ nodded, still looking apprehensive but also like he wanted to give in. "Right, I've got your big secret. Now you wanna have one of mine. Fair, I guess."
Miles shrugged helplessly. "If we're gonna be friends... I mean, it is fair, right?"
MJ glanced around at the empty seats around them, grateful that even the cashier seems to have gone to the back so that they were both totally alone together. Good spot to pick after all, he thought to himself. He kept his voice down just in case anyways.
He licked his lips and leaned his elbows on the table. "Yeah. I get it. It's a big thing you're doing for the city, y'know... doin' what you do. So here it is: I hate being a model."
Miles blinked at him, waiting for more. MJ didn't immediately being speaking again so he made a go on kind of motion with a hand.
MJ laughed a bit, shaking his head. "This is gonna be stupid. It's gonna sound so stupid! God," he rubbed the bridge of his nose with a knuckle and looked outside at a small stream of people walking past, all in a hurry to get on with whatever it was that occupied their lives.
"... About as stupid as some kid from Brooklyn putting on a costume to go out and fight crime?" Miles smiled patiently.
"Well, kinda. It was because of some punk kid from Brooklyn putting on that costume to go fight crime that I finally had the courage to like, go out there and get into my little hobby of breaking and entering, snooping around places I shouldn't, trying to help people..." MJ stopped when he saw the look on his friend's face.
"You...?" Miles started, his lips forming the shape of the words he wanted to say but not quite letting them out into the open just yet.
Did he hear that right?
As if reading his thoughts, MJ nodded. "When you took up the mantle of Spiderman after our first guy died, I took it as a sign. To like... finally just do it, right? I guess all that was left was just taking the leap, y'know what I mean?"
Miles suppressed a shudder as he nodded along, pushing Peter B's lectures out of his mind for the moment.
"I hate being a model," MJ continued, a single loc falling into his determined face, "because I wanna be a journalist. Like... an investigative journalist. But I also like science stuff as well. I guess I dunno what I really wanna be when I'm older. All I know is... I have got to get away from my overbearing mom."
"Or else," Miles finishes for him, tilting his head as if to say remember our conversation at the park?
MJ grimly confirmed it. "Or else," he replied.
Miles blew out a breath and leaned all the way back in his own seat, folding his arms over his chest. "Wow."
"Yeah, heavy stuff. I know," MJ tossed his locs back over his shoulders and glanced up at the posted menu hanging high above the register. The cashier returned from the back, placing several different pastries from a baking tray into the cafe's clean little glass display at the counter.
"Wanna...?" MJ pointed his chin at them, already pushing his chair out to get up.
"Oh, yeah. Food! Duh," Miles answered and got up to follow suit. How could he possibly forget?
The rest of their hangout goes over wonderfully after the grim conversation, all things considered. They opt to chat amicably about surface-level stuff mostly; family dynamics, friends, schoolwork and more about MJ's day job as a model.
"My mom acts like she's my agent most days, too." MJ is recounting this in between sips of his black coffee, long fingers nursing the ceramic cup he was given. "She's the one who got me into these modeling gigs in the first place. She said I had 'the look'... whatever that means. I like bein' behind the camera, though. Not in front of it," he lamented.
Miles spears some lettuce that fell out of his sandwich with the toothpick his side of pickle came with, waving it around as he talks. "Your mom sounds like the type of parent that pushes their kids around a lot. I guess I would know what that's like,"
Sensing a chance to commiserate in their shared dilemma, MJ leans forward a bit and smiles. "Your folks sounded nice when you described them. What's up?"
"I love them, and they sure do love me, but," Miles shakes his head and picks the lettuce off of his toothpick. "I dunno. They want the best for me and... sometimes it feels like nothing else matters but that."
MJ has the lower half of his face carefully hidden behind his mug when he asks: "Have you told them?"
Miles sighed, long and loud. "Yep. Yeah. They know. They do. That was... a very long story but. Anyways, yeah, after all the stuff that went down this spring, I finally had to fess up. No one else knows but you guys, though, I swear."
Miles silently patted himself on the back for managing to completely omit Ganke from the conversation. Can't give up his ace up his sleeve so soon, now can he?
MJ nods sympathetically. "I wasn't kidding, you know. Back when I told you that your secret was safe with me. You've got one of mine, so. No one else but us,"
Miles raises a pinkie over their plates and makes eye contact with him. "Pinkie promise?"
MJ's eyes flash at him.
"Duh. I never break promises," he replies, hooking pinkies together and smiling. "I'm not really in the business of ruining the life of a pretty great hero right now."
"Until it benefits you, you mean," Miles says, really only half-joking.
MJ doesn't take the bait. Instead, he deflects the best way he knows how. "Oh yeah, absolutely. If someone's out there putting a billion-dollar bounty on your head someday, you already know I'm goin' for it. What? It's a billion dollars, dude!"
They laugh together as Miles throws a piece of tomato in his direction and MJ threatens to pour the rest of his coffee onto his lap.
It felt good, felt natural. Their banter was smooth and seamless which Miles thought was a relief because very few people he encountered in life wanted to keep up with his constant sarcasm and nerdy jokes. No one else seemed to share his sense of humor except for MJ, and it made him feel a bit of warmth in his chest.
Even if they only stayed friends, he seemed to be a great companion to have nonetheless. And Miles had Ganke as backup in case anything went wrong between them. It was a daunting thing to come to terms with, the fact that such a cool guy like Hobie M. Jones had the ability to stab him behind his back at any moment's notice, or accidentally let Miles' secret double life as the crime-fighting webslinger out at the most inopportune time.
But... it wouldn't be the first time a friend has double-crossed him.
Miles wasn't stupid. He knew that letting more and more people in on his secret identity was a huge gamble, especially when it came to keeping a secret as big as this was. The risk was too high, the rewards might not even be worth it.
Worst of all, his friends could be legit and then get hurt if they ever found themselves somehow caught in the crosshairs of his other life.
... But Miles didn't want to think about that right now. That was a problem for future him. Right now, they were both too busy being what neither of their own families seemed to want them to be: a pair of carefree kids.
In this moment, MJ didn't have to worry about stifling and busy schedules arranged for him without his consent. He didn't have to worry about itchy fabrics or ill-fitting designer clothes or loud and bright cameras capturing his every move. With Miles, he could finally let loose.
And in this moment, Miles didn't have to worry about crime-fighting (for now), juggling mountains of schoolwork to please his parents, or keeping up appearances so he didn't arouse suspicions as to where he always was when he managed to slip away. With MJ, he could relax a little and enjoy the small things that always escaped his notice as he rushed this way and that, desperately trying to keep up with the chaos of his everyday life. Time seemed to slow down and speed up simultaneously when they were together.
They finished up their meal and exited the cafe, thanking the cashier and pulling on their coats to hopefully battle the frigid winter air of the city. They made their way up and down blocks, past shops and restaurants, weaving in and out of passing crowds on the sidewalk.
As they wandered aimlessly, unable to escape each other's gravitational pull for even one second, they talked some more.
They talked about Miles' art, MJ's secret science experiments in his room and how he fought his mom to get into Visions in the first place, about Miles' parents and his daily workload he usually juggles. They tried talking about Miles' start as Spiderman, but they didn't get too far along that topic before realizing there were only so many code words they could use to say what they wanted to say out loud before devolving into a fit of giggles.
They chatted about their plans after they graduate, how Miles still wants to go to Princeton and how MJ is planning on funding his own college education once he saves up enough money to leave his station in life and go wherever the wind takes him.
Miles seemed a bit sad at the thought that their friendship looked to have an eventual expiration date in the future, but there didn't seem to be anything changing MJ's mind anytime soon. After all, he didn't even know if he was going to keep in touch with Ganke once they stopped being roommates. And they ended up being pretty tight, against all odds.
So as they kept their casual pace through the city, Miles made a mental note to remember and cherish days like these as much as he could. He checked his phone for the time... this blissful moment of normalcy would have to end soon.
"So," Miles said once their long conversation eventually wound down. Their feet had taken them to a nearby subway station, the gum-covered concrete steps already beckoning them both to bid each other adieu.
"So..." MJ glanced at him, stopping them both by the railing and smiling down at his friend.
The day was drawing to a close, the sun had fully set about half an hour ago and they both needed to get out of the streets and back to their regular everyday lives. For Miles, this meant he had to get at least an hour of patrolling in before swinging back to his dorm room and getting started on his studies for their chem test on Monday.
For MJ, it meant returning back to Manhattan and steeling himself in preparation for the eventual lecture he knew he was going to get, about not staying out so late without supervision and how he didn't respond in time to his agent's texts. The usual.
"I hate to say it, but it's lookin' like we might have to say goodbye for now," Miles shrugged, hanging his head for comical effect.
MJ laughed brightly. "If I didn't know any better, I'd say you sound like you don't even wanna leave."
"You might be right about that. Wish me luck tonight, I gotta... y'know," Miles leaned casually as he could manage against the railing, shrugging a shoulder.
"Right. Do your extracurriculars,"
Miles groaned. "Yuck. Let's not call it that, please! You sound like my dad. Let's just call it my weird hobby instead."
"Okay, so I guess I gotta let you go to do your weird hobby instead, then."
"Which just so happens to be graffiti, by the way," Miles' lips quirk up mischievously, giving MJ a look as he slowly slides against the railing and places a foot on the first step. "I like to spray paint around the city every now and then... in case anyone wants to know. In case they ask."
MJ bobs his head in response, following Miles' movements. "Ah, right. Spray painting! Super cool. Anyone asks where you are, I got your back, man."
Miles' smile is as dazzling as it is endearing as he places a hand on the metal railing and lowers himself some more, unable to bring himself to cut the invisible rope anchoring him and MJ together, holding them there in that one space as a constant stream of New Yorkers climb up and down the steps beside them.
Thank you New York City, Miles finds himself thinking.
No one glanced in their direction, they were completely surrounded by people, but still alone. The lights of nearby shop signs and street lamps gave MJ a bit of a halo around his hair, and from the angle he was standing at, Miles looked up at it and believed that it made him just glow.
They gazed deeply into each other's eyes, the usual noise of the city falling easily into the background. It was just the two of them.
"... Yeah." Miles says a bit awkwardly, unable to pull away. "Yeah, that sounds... good. Great. Thanks man! You're a real one,"
MJ smiles knowingly above him. "So you might wanna head on down now. Don't wanna keep you from catching your train."
Miles grins back. "Right. My train."
"Go get 'em, Tiger." MJ responds, offering him a little salute with his fingers and finally turning away to disappear into the thick crowds that flowed up and down the city sidewalks like water.
After a little bit, Miles felt like he could breathe normally again.
He descended down.
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Miles' life went right back to normal, with a new element added in.
He still rushed through his days of back-breaking homework and tests, still tried to keep up with the crime-fighting and his family back home who kept pestering him with exclamations about how he was always late to events and get-togethers, especially as the holidays rolled around.
(His mother pulled him aside for a quick little chat on how he needs to get better at communicating where he was so that she and Jeff could make up excuses for him ahead of time)
He still gamed mindlessly with Ganke on most weekends after their school break ended and the students all traveled back to their dorms, he still texted his extra-dimensional friends whenever he was free and had a minute to spare.
But now he made some space for another special person in his life: Hobie M. Jones.
They passed notes back and forth in the classes they shared like a pair of friends back in elementary school (to avoid leaving a trail of evidence on their phones, Miles argued when he brought it up to MJ, who just laughed) and walked each other to their classes whenever they could.
But it was risky business keeping someone like MJ so close, especially if it could arouse suspicion when Spiderman happened to swoop in and save him out of the blue. Both Miles and Spiderman hovering around MJ's vicinity day in and day out could be a possible liability to contend with indeed, so Miles still tried keeping his distance whenever possible.
For what it was worth, MJ seemed to understand. He was also occasionally followed by cameras from online fans in the real world or opportunistic reporters looking to try and pry precious info of a new marketing campaign MJ happened to be a part of, so this kind of life wasn't new to him either.
Thankfully, he agreed it was best to only get together in private.
As the months flew by, exams and assignments came and went, but their friendship only flourished.
Miles found himself admitting some surprising things to MJ on late-night text conversations when he couldn't sleep and needed to hop out of his dorm window to burn some energy. He found himself doodling his friend in his sketchbook often, unable to scrub the images of his flawless modeling photos from his brain.
He found himself... doodling their names together on hastily discarded sticky notes and coming up with illegible graffiti so he can mash their names together on stickers and shamelessly slap them up onto signs, onto walls, onto bathroom stalls and stairwells and notebooks and poles and bus stops and--
Miles startled out of a reverie as he was balancing himself on a random window ledge somewhere in the city, fully suited up, sketchbook in hand as he doodled little hearts around a profile study of MJ. Tucked under the page he was working on was an embarrassing amount of stickers with his and MJ's last names on them.
God. The humiliation he would face if MJ ever got his hands on this book. His mind flashes back to the sheer embarrassment he felt back when Gwen suddenly dropped down into his room from a portal and began to leaf through his old sketchbook, finding one too many drawings of her own face in the pages.
The memories snapped him out of his weird love-induced haze and forced him to shamefully fold over the corner of the page and hide those little hearts.
First, you ran away from him after you figured out he was an MJ, now you're obsessed with him. ¿Quién te puedes entender?
The sound of Miles' conscience was taking the harsh shape of his mother's voice. Not good.
He sighed and shut his sketchbook, shoving it into his backpack that was webbed onto the wall right next to him. Crime never slept, but it did have its ebbs and flows that Miles found himself in tune with as the months went by. This hour on a Thursday evening happened to be one of the slower hours for crime fighting, it seemed.
Regardless, he yanked his bag from its sticky confines and brushed the webs off, straightening himself up from his position and mindlessly checking his phone for any pressing updates.
Finding none, and with nothing much else to do... he sent MJ a quick text.
Miles: Busy rn?
He knocked himself on the forehead for it, knowing he might regret what he was about to propose but... he couldn't get the guy out of his head. He was dreaming about MJ on the regular now, which was never a good sign. Might as well see if he was up to doing any crazy last-minute stunts since the heart seemed to want what it wanted.
The reply came almost immediately after.
MJ: Nope, just surrounded by a pile of annoying hw, why do you ask?
Miles grinned as he typed a quick reply, hit send, and shot a web up to climb to the roof of the building.
Miles: I'm thinking I'm like... about a 15 mins walk away from your place. Wanna hang? I can swing by
He can almost taste the eye roll in MJ's replies, which made him smile beneath his mask.
MJ: You're corny as hell and that's exactly why you're my friend
MJ: Just give me a few to get ready
Miles sends back an affirmative, and tucks his phone right into his bag's side pocket which he then throws over a shoulder. He turns towards the general direction that MJ's penthouse apartment is located, right over the Brooklyn Bridge.
On his way there, he rehearses all of the coolest lines he could think of, not quite hoping to impress his friend or anything, but hoping that maybe MJ won't see him for the weird dork everyone else treats him as. And... to also keep him from suspecting anything or whatever.
They've hung out together countless times before, after their initial meetup. And not once did flawless-fashionable-cool-model MJ make him feel like he was ever uncool or off-putting. Maybe that was why Miles was so infatuated with him, when it came down to it. Still a good idea to play it safe, just in case.
It would have served Miles much better if he gave this friendship an even wider berth, retained his mysterious reputation... but there was something so arresting about MJ's eyes, his mannerisms and gentleness that contrasted so sharply with his quick wit, surprising bravery and intelligence.
Miles can shoot off the wittiest lines on the planet, but at the end of the day, he was still a boy with a crush. Alas.
In the time that he vaulted around NYC as Earth-1610's Spiderman, Miles developed a knack for snappy one-liners that MJ seemed to find endearing. Whenever they were together, they often fell into good-natured jabs and quips at each other, and he was so enamoured by it.
And it seemed like they just... naturally fell into the gravity of each other's orbit often anyways. Miles would look up into a crowd anywhere at Visions and immediately be able to find MJ. Like he developed an MJ-sense alongside his own spidery ones.
Two twin stars locked in orbit, a binary system forever hurtling through space together.
God, he really needed to get it together. That was super cheesy even for him, and he watched Titanic on his laptop damn near a hundred times at this point.
The thought had him yanking on his webs much harder and flying through the late evening air just to burn off the heat that built up in his gut.
He had to quickly remind himself that regardless of whatever happened between them, he promised that he would forever cherish it all. Miles wasn't an idiot, he knew that being Spiderman put a dampener on a lot of his relationships in life. It was a constant tug-of-war between him and his parents, and Ganke often reminds him of how absent he is at school, even when he's present.
Whatever happens between him and MJ in the future is whatever happens. Miles has already made peace with the inevitability of reality, like he so often needed to in this life. No need to get his hopes up.
Sobering up, Spiderman does several somersaults in the air before attaching a web onto the corner of MJ's swanky high-rise located not too far from the bridge. He sticks to the reflective glass and lets gravity do all the work for him as he drops down a few stories, hoping he was just a quick black blur that could be chalked up to just being a bird of some kind in case anyone happened to glance out their windows.
He hasn't been over to MJ's apartment at all, but knows the building from the outside very well thanks to the two friends' prior escapades. MJ's mom was strict according to him, and after sneaking them both out of the window to go to a mall or hang out at a park, swing around the city a bit and then drop MJ off back home, Spiderman was well acquainted with his bedroom window as a result.
He finds it again effortlessly and hangs upside down by a web, slowly lowering himself into view.
MJ's eyes light up immediately upon seeing him. He perks up, gets up from his computer chair to carefully lock the bedroom door and moves right back to his window.
"Well hello there, Spiderman! Glad you could make it." MJ smiles warmly, keeping his voice down. "Sorry, mom and the team are in the living room and I just told her I'm lockin' myself in here to study as hard as I can. Finals coming up and all... but we don't have too much time."
"Which is why you're only stepping out for a bit of air, right? Real quick, I promise." Spiderman replies good-naturedly. "It'll help clear your head."
MJ huffs out a laugh and shakes his head. "Where would I be without you?"
"It's Spiderman's job to help all of the citizens of New York... and you look like you could use it, so,"
MJ slides his window open even wider, already throwing a leg over the sill. "My hero."
Together, they drop down a few stories, just free-falling and enjoying the chill of the late evening for a few seconds, shrouded by the dusk's descent that was already darkening the vast sky above them.
MJ gasps breathlessly when Spiderman shoots out a web and sends them sailing over congested streets filled to the brim with cars and trucks, over tall street lamps and past bright digital billboards advertising all kinds of products.
They zoom past more buildings, arcing gracefully around corners. At one point, MJ dares to loosen a grip on Spiderman's shoulders and splay his fingers out against the wind.
They fly together like birds for a minute more, soaring through the air and then rounding right back on the path they carved into it so Spiderman could deposit his friend right back home.
MJ said they didn't have much time, right? And Miles was satisfied with their short little hangout anyhow. He got his hands on his crush, had him clinging onto his arms and his neck the entire time they were airborne. It was getting late and he had to head back to Visions himself as well.
"Take me up to the roof real quick," MJ pants into his ear. Miles tries very hard not to think too much about that as he wordlessly follows orders and makes a beeline for the roof access.
Together, they land near the edge, overlooking the concrete jungle that was Manhattan, surrounded on all sides by tall buildings that seemed to reach up to heavens, still much taller than MJ's own building.
It was a miracle they weren't seen together, but that might've been because of the glitter and glitz of the city night all around them. New Yorkers never really looked up anyways.
Below them, the traffic and the bustle of the city continued at its usual pace; a constant thrum of vibrations, sounds and lights as they flowed up and down the streets like blood cells traveling through veins.
Both boys leaned their elbows onto the roof's raised edge and peered all around them, enjoying their temporary peace, catching their breath.
"I'm real glad I met you, you know?" MJ says, uncharacteristically sincere. His face was an open door now, but he was still unable to meet Spiderman's eyes.
Miles thought it might be appropriate to keep his mask on for now.
"Man, I only swung us around for like a few minutes. You don't need to confess your love for me, I'll take a thanks as payment. That's all." He joked but still tried to keep the sarcasm light. Didn't want to ruin the moment, after all.
MJ offered a crooked smirk at that, but then sobered up again. "Nah, really, man. I mean it. I'm not sure where I'd be right now if I hadn't transferred over to Visions and literally bumped into you. Crazy how life works like that, huh?"
"Right, especially since you were my biggest fan before that," Miles reminds him. "Serendipity or whatever."
MJ nods slowly. "Serendipity. Yeah... exactly. Sorry. What did you just say?"
Caught off guard, Miles hesitates for a bit. Play dumb, Morales!
"Uhh, what did I just say?"
MJ laughs, punching Miles on the arm before folding his own arms over his chest. "I was a fan of the old Spiderman before you came along. When he died..." he averts his eyes, studying his shoes. "Yeah, that sucked. But then you came along out of the blue... anyways. I just took it as a sign, that's all."
Miles dramatically wilts against the side of the roof. "Daaamnn, bro. I just swung you around the city for a bit! I gave you a free ride, and I don't even get to be your favorite? I see how it is."
MJ bursts out laughing. "Don't worry, Spiderman," he says, holding up his hands placatingly. "You're on your way to replacing him soon enough! Keep giving me those free rides. And uh... thanks," he finishes lamely, raising his hand to shoot his friend a salute. "Yeah. Thanks. For this."
They smile sheepishly at each other for a few seconds and Miles swears he's going to start roasting alive in his suit pretty soon from the way the warmth in his chest was radiating outward towards every limb.
Butterflies were swirling inside of his gut and he swears he can hear the sappy music from a romance movie Miles watched recently playing somewhere near them. Maybe now was the time to... stop avoiding his feelings? Take that leap of faith, right?
He's done it many times before. This time was probably no different than any other time where he's been thrown way out of his comfort zone only to be kinda glad it happened, in retrospect.
He opened his mouth and started to speak at the same time MJ did.
"So, Em--"
"Uh, so--"
They jumped in unison, wide eyes meeting wide lenses. MJ dipped his head.
"Oh, sorry I was--" Miles chuckled, bopping his forehead with a hand. "S-sorry, what were you gonna say?"
He winced at the jarring awkwardness of it all. The sappy music went silent, the mood thoroughly ruined.
"Oh, well, uh--" MJ looked just as flustered as Miles felt. "N-nah, sorry, I was just gonna say that... that it's been a little while now. So I should probably be heading back," he gestured awkwardly over his shoulder towards the side of the building, trailing off.
"Riiiight, right. Yeah, duh. Of course. Just, uh," Miles turns so his back is facing his friend, gesturing at it as if to say hop on. "Lost track of time, I guess. My bad,"
"What were you gonna say?" MJ asks, right next to Miles' ear as always.
Silently, Miles tucks that part of himself away again for later.
He was really 100% willing to risk it all and go for it, just fully display all of that for a measly chance at getting to date the most popular kid at school right now, and one of the coolest people that he's ever met. He would kick himself if he weren't carrying him right there on his back.
What a stupid idea, Miles. Real dumb, even for you.
In a fraction of a second, he stuffs his emotions right back down in him. Time and place. Not the time, not the place, he reasons. They'd just met a few months ago, and they got off on a pretty rocky start. It just wasn't the time to be making such rash decisions. Yeah, that was it.
"Nah, forget it. I think I was just gonna ask if you wanted to come with me and Ganke to our favorite comic shop this weekend, but that's a dumb question--"
MJ suddenly squeezed his hands tighter around Miles' shoulders. "Duh! It's a dumb question because the answer is obviously yes, of course."
"You like comic books!? Since when?" Miles exclaimed in shock.
"I'm beating you as the top student in chem class right now. You are not nerdier than me. Stop playin' with me." MJ grumbles grumpily. He digs his chin vindictively into Miles' shoulder.
Miles' loud bark of laughter echoed off the rooftop as he takes a running leap towards the ledge, hops on it and promptly sends them plummeting several stories down.
MJ's cry echoed around them even louder.
After about a minute or so, MJ's back inside of his room and they're both trying very hard to suppress laughter so hard that their cheeks hurt and they're crying tears.
Thankfully, outside of the bedroom door, MJ's family never heard a thing.
#spiderverse#punkflower#miles morales#hobie brown#it started off angsty and then i had to go and be all sappy about it baaawwww#i reread a lot of this story trying to regain the memories of what exactly i wrote before and man that first chapter sure was a bummer huh#i was like.... maaannnn these boys have to put up with SO MUCH and i need them to just be kids again for my sanity#as a treat#yeah i hope y'all enjoyed and also thanks so much for being so patient with me if you've been waiting for updates OTL#guess how i'm trying to stay sane this winter! i'm writing about wholesome fluffy sappy maybe-but-maybe-not boyfriends i fuckin guess#will they won't they... i think that's how you sum up spidermanxMJ dynamics in four words right?#but yeah i think y'all already know that these 2 are endgame in my heart no matter what#so its not like i'm leaving a devastating cliffhanger or anything lol :p#a lot inspired these two dorks and their fluffy and frustrating relationship and that is: mj and peter in the mcu movies#i felt like they were a p good summation of what a young and closed off mj would be like with a dorky nerd who has a big secret#and also just. miles. and his relationships in the comics in general. gosh he is simply too sweet...#they're two teens still figuring shit out yanno? maybe they'll have their romance in college lol#and andrew garfield and emma stone's relationship was also so cute... idk i just love a lil rivalry going between partners too sue me#i can see a rivalry happening between this spiderman and mj for surrrre#so many options to choose from!!#anyways thx for reading!#mi writing#clown paint
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Eichi gives away the mask so easily because it was never meant to be an "engagement ring" like you delulu wataeis imagined it to be lmao. It was wataru saying that he will continue playing tsumugi clown role in fine and won't leave it for hokuto's mother troupe after graduation. Do you dumb fucks even read the stories? Eichi didn't even understand tf that mask meant when wataru gave it to him and wataru referenced fucking tsumugi in his "proporsal". I dunno why the f you think it's ok to lie about "! EnDiNG wItH wAtAeI EnGaGeMEnT" when the chapter it happened wasn't even close to the end of ep:link. Cope
PS: how do you live with the fact that Eichi clearly admitted to never being in love in his life and Wataru said that even though Eichi likes him, he still can easily discard him for the sake of his objectives?
I love you anon thank you for giving me a nice reason to ramble again beautiful ask 10/10 I'm sorry this is probably not how you hoped this would go but this is such a funny block of text delightful really thank you for the enrichment please marry me
But okay yes now to get down to the actual ask just to disclaim I am solely relying on translations seeing as I do not speak japanese well enough to understant the original text so if anyone has anything to add to this or to correct me on please feel free to do so.
Now to get started I'm not sure if one could say Eichi gave away the mask "So easily" seeing as he claimed that it was "a hard choice to make"? Which, as one might know, implies unease with an idea and pondering and debating and a general amount of thinking behind a decision so? I know this isn't really the main focus of this ask but I'm just a tad miffed with the semantics of it is all. And in either case giving the mask back to Wataru while expecting it back still shows a certain degree of trust in their relationship it wouldn't have been such a big deal for him (as it apparently was) if the mask didn't have a lot of sentimental value to him (the both of them really if we look at the whole exchange).
Now to the claim that the mask was "only" Watarus promise to stay with fine and "continue playing Tsumugis clown role". This is not entirely incorrect. Regarding the acting troupe and staying with fine bit at least.
I'm assuming this bit in EP:Link Deadend/7 is what you are referencing, and I see where you're coming from. But the bluebird line
from literally three dialogue lines further down, which references this line of dialogue (notorious Eichi line everyone should be familiar with)
kind of somewhat really recontextualises that? Because you see this is a reference to a fairytale about a pair of siblings and they get sent out by a nice fairy to find the bluebird of happiness for her sad daughter to make her happy again so they both go on an adventure and travel far and search and search but they can not find the bluebird of happiness and then when they return home again, disappointed because they couldn't find the blue bird, they realise only one night has actually passed and the journey was probably just a dream. But then their eyes fall upon their pet dove in it's cage which appears blue all of a sudden and so they gift it to the fairies sad daughter which becomes happy again and sets the bird free. The real bluebird of happiness is a dove. At least in the version of the story I'm familiar with but I mean everyone sees the symbolism right? It's. very hard to miss.
And then dropping this?
I'm not sure how to say this properly but in the overall context this makes it pretty clear that Tsumugi has nothing to do with this anymore this is Fully between Wataru and Eichi. And I am the last person to dismiss Tsumugis significance in the course of Wataeis relationship as characters I will be among the first to protest when someone dismisses the importance of Tsumugis and Eichis relationship in favour of some image they have of Wataei but he has nothing to do with this one.
Yes Tsumugi gets namedropped but - again - I don't really see how that would lessen the sentiment Wataru is triying to convey here? Because. Yes. Why wouldn't he mention Tsumugi?
The entire conversation pretty much boils down to "Yes I was initially only in this because I thought I could replace Tsumugis role in your life and then I wanted to leave but we have spent so much time together that I realised that that is definitely not working out because I really do love you. I love you as a teammate; I love you as a friend; I love you as a person and I am very angry at myself for not managing to get that into your head. So please allow me to stay with you for as long as you'll have me." And then also Eichi not understanding because he has the emotional self awareness of a very emotionally unaware loaf of bread and also because he hates himself that is a very big thing about his character huge part of his character arc actually that he. you know? Hates himself? And feels guitly for his actions during the war? And doesn't think he deserves love and companionship? Which is why Wataru wanting to stay with him for him and not for some twisted form of revenge is such an alien concept to him? Because he is projecting his insecurities onto Wataru? As one is wont to do when they hate themself? "EiChi Didn'T eVen UnDErStanD WhAt tf ThAT Mask MEAnt" Yeah. That's. That's the point? So he can think about it and come to that conclusion himself which works as a keymoment in his characters journey from hating life and himself to enjoying being alive and wanting to live on because of the people he's surrounded with? He literally explains why he didn't immediately understand the mask during the EP:Link Epilogue/4
And to get back to the "I dunno why the f you think it's ok to lie about "! EnDiNG wItH wAtAeI EnGaGeMEnT" about which I have two things to say:
"Lying" implies further intent and an effort. Neither of which exist in this case.
He literally went down on one knee while making a big proclamation of offering himself to Eichi with a very personal item that works as a symbol for their commitment to each other on a starlit rooftop. The comparison writes itself.
3. https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Joke
And then I expected there to be a proper reason given and instead you proceed to follow that up with "when the chapter it happened wasn't even close to the end of ep:link". I know the shame is on me for expecting something sensical from an ask which has been near constant in it's lack of correct statements but such is human nature I suppose. And you are not wrong. Deadend/7 isn't very close to the end of EP:Link. That is true.
But do you know what Is very close to the end of EP:Link? The Epilogue Chapters 3-5.
Do you know what the content of those chapters is? I do. Very well actually :)
(Eichi literally explains why he didn't get it)
So if this answers your "Do you dumb fucks even read the stories?" questions, Yes. And I think I'm a lot better at it than you. So I'd say I'm coping quite well over here :p
PS: Regarding your PS, I take the "I've never been in love before so I wouldn't know" comment with a lot of humour actually as an aroace person who's emotional self awareness also ends at "good" and "Not good" I think it's very funny all things considered especially because he mentioned the loving Wataru thing several times before that and I'm generally of the belief that actions speak louder than words and also am in a happy long term relationship with the concept of "Reading Subtext". So please excuse me for not breaking down in tears everytime someone reminds me of that one singuar line of text in one of my favourite all time enstars stories that came out three years ago which also brought us the single best card set in the entire game
as well as absolute banger dialogue such as
Among others <33
And there are soooooo many other examples of wataei dialogue that simply make me swoon but I have already had to take out so many of the one's I wish I could put here so this wouldn't get "Do you love the colour of the sky" long
And also, regarding your "Wataru said that even though Eichi likes him, he still can easily discard him for the sake of his objectives" I'll just say that no he absolutely could not. I mean he'd say that and if pull comes to shove and he has no other option then he might seriously consider it but may I mention that Wataru was gone for a few days at most but really not that long of a time during Sanctuary and Eichi stopped considering being a normal rational person that doesn't leave helpless 17 year olds in the midst of a construction site. Very different situation but I feel like it's worth mentioninh here. Another example is Eichis almost not being able to go through with the war because of Wataru. Wataru had to actively come and tell Eichi to go through with it. Wataru isn't the reason Eichi started the war, that is wrong, but he is the reason Eichi almost didn't finish it. and during the war era that was his Main objective. Again I'm part of the fraction "actions speak louder than words" Show don't tell and all that, but even the words are pushing it.
And that concludes my essay :)
#I so won this#there were so many pictures and quotes I wanted to include but the limit..... :'(#if any of you were wondering I am still as insane about them as I ever was#thank you anon really genuinely and fully this has been a blast#if anyone reads the whole thing....mwah let's run off into the ocean together#or something like that idk but it is appreciated#they are my everything they really are#I'm very enamoured with the ''Cope''#Cope with what? I have nothing to cope with? well nothing wataei related at least#or the ''How do you live with the fact'' yadda yadda#How am I supposed to live with it it's funny i think it's very funny#You really trust what enstars characters say and take it at face value without examining the subtext further? amateur mistake#it's so passionate too anon i admire you#imagine disliking something so intensely you sent a very wordy ask to someone because of a silly post they made#I wish I had that much vigor in me#I mean i'd be too polite to even if I did but still it has somehting admireable to it#thanks to you i got to reread some of my favourite wataei interactions so now I think the last three hours were three hours well spent :)#genuinely thank you for the enrichment#I hope youll have a nice day we might not see eye to eye on this and I'm also objectively better at reading these stories and understanding#the characters but I still hope you'll have a nice day#as good karma or something#I'm currently still on that dopamine high from writing this i think it's obvious#best mood I've been in in ages I love talking about wataei#okay good I'll conclude the tags I've already stretched this post out so far i might as well spare the poor tag reader#but then again if you have read the post this far what's a few more tags to you#I really like the fact that the real bluebird is a dove it's soooooooo#it's good it's really good in the overall context#wataei#eichi tenshouin#hibiki wataru
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I keep thinking that this Gojo is just like Sukuna. I truly don't see much of a difference between them beyond the human/curse point of view
#If not Sukuna then some other more palatable special degree curses like the one he just killed that talked about the new humanity#It truly looks like that I don't know#Trying to be unbiased about the pretty concepts I take personally#and trying to ignore the silly fact that Sukuna's domain is literally called temple of evil or something (makes one want to ask#so many things like why the hell does he call it such? isn't evil good for you? Isn't a species kind of thing?#Why are you adhering to human notions and conceptualisations if you seem so beyond them and think nothing of them?)#Gojo is quite terrifying from a curse point of view. He is cruel and merciless. He can't be reasoned with and he is playful. He has his fun#His powers are not much different in structure from those of a curse and he said that the power capacity of a sorcerer comes from birth#So it's ontological. It's not just skill. It's an essential differentiation. Just like curses#It's just... I don't know. It's almost as if he were a curse himself. He talks about emotions being the source of curses?#Maybe that's the difference? Was Sukuna born that way too?#I don't know. I keep thinking that he is quite idk monstrous in a very Sukuna way. He isn't terrible like Sukuna is like with the kids#But he is human after all. He does adhere to human categories. Sukuna is something else#And yet Gojo uses the kids. He draws lines and he is caring and gentle and sweet in his way#but he very much uses the kids and is a bit flippant about it. And he is human#I don't know. It seems completely intentional this similarity between Gojo and the curses and Gojo and Sukuna in particular#Sukuna seems interested in Megumi while Gojo seems interested in Itadori and idk I just keep thinking#but I'm not even know about what or how#I find this man very hard to trust haha the parallels are intriguing#I think this piece of worldbuilding has potential as well as their characterisations#I hope the author will do something with all this#I talk too much#Jujutsu Kaisen#Gojo Satoru#Sukuna
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Noticed there wasn’t a ton of photocheer fanart and I wanted to change that (which why isn’t there more these two dorks are so cute together!!!!)
#come get your food (art edition) fellow photocheer’s you must be STARVING#also to anyone interested in getting into this paring read there is a light and it never goes out by pearlypairings (it’s on AO3!)#to me it is THE photocheer fic#it’s amazing and I love it (also a sequel fic from Chrissy’s pov has started and it’s also really good so far!!!)#it was my gateway into getting into it so I think it’s a good place to start#after posting this I am in fact going to reread it that’s how good it is#anyways I’m definitely going to make more art for them cause they were so fun to draw together (just got figure something out first)#listened to the smiths while drawing this (got the queen is dead on vinyl recently)#also the usual stuff too like alvvays and joy division (my beloved fave bands <3)#OH ALMOST FORGOT!!! I added pins and patches of Jonathan’s fave bands on his bag cause that bag would have LOVED to have some on there#shame it died like his rusty car </3 an unknown pleasures patch suits it nicely#I have a whole post about it too (the sketch for this inspired it btw)#and Chrissy’s skirt is a corduroy one btw (I have a similar one irl)#thought I’d mention that cause Idk of it reads as a corduroy skirt#I’m going to stop rambling now cause that’s too many tags (hope this enters the tags cause sometimes my rambles cause my own works demise#:’] )#stranger things#jonathan byers#chrissy cunningham#photocheer#jonathan x chrissy
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A little something featuring Fuuta and Es after talking about their criminal lack of interaction in fanworks with @waivyjellyfish ! You had such awesome ideas (a few of which I'm still bouncing around in my head to post at some point,) but this one ended up taking over my brain -- I hope you enjoy 😅 Attempting to answer the widely-debated question:
“Oi, why didn’t you hit me?”
Es looked up from their paperwork.
“Prisoner number three. Most people are glad when they’re not struck.”
“Well, I’m not.”
Es usually left the door open at this hour, in case anyone had any last-minute complaints before curfew. No one usually took them up on the offer. They figured that if there was any prisoner they could count on to complain, it would be Fuuta marching through their door.
“You hit all the other guys. You even hit some of the girls that were giving you trouble. So what? You think I’m too weak? You think I can’t take it?” Fuuta spread his arms. “I can, so show me what you’ve got!”
Es sighed. They put down their pen. They folded their gloved hands together, resting their chin on top. “Fuuta, I’m not going to hit you.”
“Why not?”
“As of right now, I have no reason to. If you’re referring to the interrogations…”
They reflected on the first one they'd shared with him. To be fair, the thought had crossed their mind. It would have been satisfying to give this rowdy prisoner a taste of his own medicine – striking him after such a dramatic charge at them. But Es was always good at reading people. It didn’t take them long to understand Fuuta was the type to lash out first and ask questions later. In fact, that was likely what had landed him in Milgram in the first place.
Although Es knew they weren’t here to do any reformation, they wanted to try to show these prisoners where they’d gone wrong. So, they resolved to act as the bigger person. They’d prove that senseless violence was just that. By keeping their composure, they’d show Fuuta just how childish he was being.
That wasn’t my only reason. I guess that's true, my actions weren’t all purely righteous. I still spent the entire time looking for ways to make him squirm… But it wasn’t all cruelty. I really did want to understand. I wanted to help. That counts for something, right?
Es never struck the prisoners out of anger, or as a petty show of power. It was a way to force the prisoner to mind their ego. When they’d gotten a bit too full of themselves, a bit too comfortable with the awful deed they’d committed, Es’ blow encouraged them to feel a bit more humility and guilt.
By the time the second trial arrived, Fuuta oozed guilt.
The moment Es entered the interrogation room, it was clear that he needed no lesson in humility. He hugged his arms to his chest. His remaining eye darted around the room in thinly-veiled hysteria. His voice trembled when he spoke. It didn’t require any people-reading skills to hear the remorse that underlaid all of his accusations and threats.
Hitting the others felt like giving a dog a tap on the nose after breaking a rule. Meanwhile, Fuuta snapped and snarled like a stray who’d been kicked time and time again.
Of course, he could never know any of this. Any way Es phrased it, Fuuta would misunderstand it as pity.
Well, wasn’t it? I thought he looked like a kicked puppy – that sounds a lot like pity. No, it was out of respect. Does that mean I didn’t respect the prisoners I did hit? No. I respected them too. Then, what’s the difference?
Fuuta was still staring at them, asking the very same question. What’s the difference?
“Each of Milgram’s prisoners is unique.”
They were met with an unimpressed glare.
Es chose their words carefully. “Each one responds best to a variety of treatments. Some need attention to be comfortable, while others need time. Some need validation in order to confess. Others, a bit of debate does the trick. Some need a show of force. You –” remind me too much of myself “– require something else. I’ve learned to change my approach depending on the person I’m dealing with.”
Fuuta’s features flashed with confusion, then shame, then his usual mask of anger. “Tch. How pathetic.”
“Excuse me?”
“So you just change your personality when it’s convenient? You put up fake smiles and fake attitude? Have some balls and just be yourself.”
Es was caught by surprise. “... I am. Those are all pieces of myself. I choose to bring out different parts when it would be most helpful.”
“Sounds manipulative as hell to me.”
It makes sense he doesn’t understand. He’s a very clear-cut person, with every aspect of his personality lining up in a way that makes sense. I find that predictability fun. Or, is it something that I envy? Could it be both?
They had no time to dwell on it, as Fuuta was struck with an idea. “Though, if you can do it on command, why don’t you give me the ‘you’ that wants to hit someone?”
He spread his arms once more, hands gesturing to his chest. Es pretended not to notice him wince. They remained in their seat.
“What are you waiting for? Hit me!”
“I will not.”
“You just said you can change your personality on a whim, so let’s see it!”
“That is not what I said.”
His good eye began to look frenzied. He raised his voice. “You scared? The big bad warden of Milgram, nothing but a big coward!”
“Stop this. You’re acting childish.”
“No! You’re treating me childishly! Let me see the Es that kicked Shidou! The one that slapped Kazui! Treat me like you treated them!”
“I hit them because they said something stupid. They deserved it.”
“Are you fucking kidding? I deserve it too! I deserve it! Come on!”
At the last word, his voice broke. He stumbled to his knees. He let his head drop. He sucked in strained breath after strained breath. Shidou would surely give him a lecture about getting so worked up with his injuries.
Es finally stood.
They made their way around the desk. They knelt on the floor in front of him.
“Why?” he wheezed. “Tell me…”
“Fuuta.”
Should I just go ahead and do it, just to make him happy? No, I want to talk it out. But what do even I say? I'll tell him that I care. I can’t. None of the prisoners understand that I care. Why? Why is it so hard for them to see? I’m trying my best, why can’t they see?
Es extended their hand carefully. They didn’t know what they hoped to accomplish, but in that moment their thoughts were too loud and conflicting. They needed to do something.
Fuuta saw the gentle intention, and immediately raised his own hand to strike. It froze midair, though whether it was from Milgram’s restrictions or his own hesitation, Es would never know.
Neither of their gestures connected.
Footsteps. Then Yuno’s voice, hesitantly from the doorway. “We heard shouting, is everything alright in here?”
Es retracted their hand. A beat. Fuuta dropped his, too.
“Yuno. Yes, we’re fine. Fuuta was just heading to bed. I’m going to walk him to his cell.”
“I can handle myself.”
“I said, I’m going to walk him to his cell.”
Es stood, nodding to Yuno. When she’d gone, they turned their attention back to the prisoner crumpled on the ground. They made an effort to quiet their ever-racing thoughts.
“Listen. I know you can handle yourself. I’m not doing this because I think you’re weak. You’re strong. Don’t think for a moment that I don’t see that.”
They held out their arm to help him up. He didn’t move.
“Sometimes you are a bit too strong, if you ask me. I mean, picking fights with your prison warden, really?” They clicked their tongue. “You should be grateful for a superior that gives you second chances.”
At last, Fuuta took their hand. He avoided meeting their eyes, but his voice had softened considerably from his rant. “The only thing you give me is a headache.”
Es offered a dry smile as they pulled him to his feet. “The feeling is mutual.”
#milgram#es#fuuta kajiyama#i fully intended on writing something silly/sweet so SORRY this was a lot of drama 😭 silly and sweetness coming soon i promise adsfsdf#i really do think es would see themself in fuuta to some degree#something about them being filled with audience voices and fuuta also being a reflection of the audience... idk...#it makes me crazy how much es cares !!!! their line at the end of baptism of fire about how they dont hate the prisoners#and they now have a connection that cant be broken#and they see them all as comrades#it makes me crazy!!!#they have too many conflicting thoughts/feelings of WARDEN DUTY to flat out say 'hey i care about you'#but they do!!!! ;---;#i had some fun writing es' internal monologue like that! i debated on making it specifically a conversation between voices (using 'you' or#third person pronouns) but i think this still gets the idea across well#i know es never actually gave a straight answer to the final question but i hope this still gave a good peek at their reasoning#i genuinely dont think es pities him but he IS a pathetic wet cat in t2 and that definitely influences their actions in some way#i believe your exact words were 'red-haired fucked up dog' and i hope i could do that image justice 😎👍#drabbles
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okay i do have faith in the bucktommy fandom at large and especially i have faith in the people that i follow but i do just wanna say that we all have to promise to be normal if/when buck gets another love interests or ends up with someone else. like if it's not tommy and it's not eddie, then we have to promise not to be terrible the way antis were terrible to us. like im not saying grr you have to like it, criticize the story all you want, criticize the writers for their biphobia, their lazy writing, etc. but i really hope we can all continue to be normal about buck possibly dating other people and giving the love interest a fair chance
#because i know the writers wont give them a fair chance or decent writing so its important to me#that we treat them with at the very least tolerance yknow#this fandom and specifically buddie focused antis havent been particularly kind to love interests especially women#and bucktommy was a nice break from that i mean obviously people were awful to tommy but they have a pretty big following the way#the other li didnt so it was nice to see positivity across my dash and be a part of a community that was accepting and enjoyed the storyline#so going forward even though we wont get anyone as meaningful as tommy and it looks like buddie has been killed for like the 50th time#i hope we can extend love to whoever shows up next 💕 or if not love you know just acceptance#which can coexist with criticsm of their handling of this storyline and tommy as a character and the not so subtle biphobia#idk idk i dont want this sector of the 911 fandom to devolve into the same hatred that bob antis have over not getting what they want#because this has been such a good and positive experience that i just havent had with 911 in so long
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#couldnt find any gn gm gifs#so i had to make my own#and i also wanted sparkles#so i made a sparkly clown and sparkly heart gifs#the hearts were a pain i hope you like them#might redo the picmix bc it sucks to use on mobile#feel free to use the hearts with credit and stuff? idk i just like them and would appreciate it a lot#BLINKIES FROM blinkies.cafe I JUST CHANGED THE WORDS#good morning gif#picmix#my picmix#sparkle gif#my gif#my edit#lifesteal smp#lifestealblr#lifesteal gif#clownpierce#clownpierce gif#you’ll never be able to guess one of the youtubers i like /j#i love making picmixs they are so fun
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no one understands cass like i do </3
#idk why i try watching any videos about tangled the series lmao everyone always hates cass#like shut upp 😭 you dont get ittttt#my post#tangled#<- for blog tagging purposes#ending that video short ended up lining up with my sleep time anyway#everyones always like 'wtf is wrong with her' shes mental illness 💔#the video was even like 'varian is so mental ill i feel bad for him' and then later was like#'why are these characters (varian *and* cass) acting this way' this way being mentally ill-ish lol#whatever man im tired goodnight#i had a feeling the video would go that way anyway just cause of how the person was talking about the show in general#they were definitely going at the show from a fandom adult perspective#cause they were like 'why is there so many episodes that have no lore!' buddy the show was made for children#and idk they were being negative a lot#i mean good for them i hope they had fun anyway but i was Not lol#also man i dont dislike varian at all but hearing other people talk about him gets on my nerves#why is everyone obsessed with this child#hes a good character and hes fun and i enjoy him in the show but like.... what.....#anyway whatever i support womens wrongs i love cassandra goodnight fr this time
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Random thought but I do think that fun can be such a good marker of whether or not something is healthy for you or even sometimes if it’s just good in general.
#of course not always! because we can be really blind#and stubborn#but also I mean over the course of time if something is still#fun#and it’s GOOD fun pure fun TRUE fun. the kind that bubbles up like joy and surprise and delight#and a bit of soda pop fizzle#that’s such a good sign that it IS good and it is good for you!!!#anyway I’ve been thinking a lot about investment in celebrities’ personal lives#and yes yes not a weakness of many but absolutely a weakness of MINE#I was thinking about how it often happened that at the height of an obsession of mine with a celebrity/their life it would stop being fun!!#And I would become absolutely miserable#because I was expending emotional energy where I didn’t need to be#and so I would have to draw way back. and when I did time would pass and life would unfold#and now it’s like—-I hope Taylor and Travis get engaged#it would be sooooo fun for me as a long time swift stan and care-abouter of Taylor’s happiness#and as a lover of romance and engagements#and also because engagements are front-facing in nature! they belong to the public a little bit!#in some small measure! so it would be appropriate to care and rejoice#and also I couldn’t take it very far or for very long until it was (again) no longer my business#but I guess my point is: fun is a good indicator of where that line is#it will stop being fun when it stops being relevant/personal/applicable/news I can actually participate in and rejoice in honestly#on another note sometimes in my teaching I will hear students discussing who I should marry#and it is—for a brief moment—so fun for me actually. it’s pure and funny and a reminder that THEY believe I could find romance#and should. and also if I were to take them seriously for a second. if I were to be like ‘hey can you guys set me up’#it would instantly become Not Fun anymore for them AND for me and that’s just !!!!!!!#idk i think it’s super important (and also super important to have a well-honed sense of fun I guess) (but that’s another conversation#ANYWAY#some THOUGHTS
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